Wednesday, January 31, 2007

Christians fear Kompakt releases will make kids gay


Poor Ned Flanders: unsure about what blasphemous, satanic or perverted downloads Rod or Todd may have stored away on their iPod (or ‘iGod’ as he’d most likely prefer). And all while still reeling from the time he took them to see Chris Rock after misreading the date as ‘Christian Rock’.

For him, some entity insisting that it represents America’s moral majority has at least alerted him to the practising sodomites out there plus – praise the lord! - other artists that are supposedly “propagating a gay message”. Interestingly, this doesn’t include Cyndi Lauper (despite her Junior Vasquez reinventions) but does include Ghostface Killah and Metallica as part of an ongoing project to make Jesus-loving parents aware of safe and unsafe bands. Suggesting, as it does, that “one of the most dangerous ways homosexuality invades family life is through popular music”.

Most bizarre is how this hardly extensive catalogue of sin, which naturally features the extreme queercore shock tactics of Elton John and Cole Porter, also includes an underground producer like Justus Köhncke. [Nobody has yet alerted its compilers to Steps or Bloc Party.] However, when sent a link, Köhncke replies with a euphoric “that’s the most glamorous, fundamental listing I've ever had the pleasure to find myself in” while fellow disco darling Daniel Wang – whose same-sexing has been ignored by the Houston-based Love God’s Way crew – responds to his omission with “I have no idea how Justus got on there – I’m not famous enough” before adding “I will be releasing a new album this year, hopefully shooting myself like an uncorked champagne bottle to the top of that list”.

“I actually suspect it’s a Borat style hoax,” says an unconvinced Richard Smith at Gay Times, “some of it is a bit too knowing.” Either way, this kind of thing is not to be taken seriously.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Nice piece.